Ramblings

Well I had another sleepless nite no surprise but I really think that my body is getting ready for a little munchkin to be born here soon I was having contractions that were waking me out of my sleep and I guess I was crying or moaning I knew it was not true labor but they sure hurt....... I hope they have the epidural ready for me for when I walk in for I don't think I can handle the pain I admire the women who go with out it but know that I'm just not one of them I am what you call a Sissy hehe.
You know this baby thing has made me think ab a lot of thing in life......
As a lot of you know I did not have the best of a childhood not until I was 13 and was blessed with my parents I have been thinking ab how sometimes life is not what you imagine it to be but what God wants it to be for you at the present time for the first 12 1/2 years of my life I spent it from house to house and person to person even stranger to stranger..... I never knew when something bad was going to happen or when the next beating was going to occur I lived in fear of what would come ab me and if I would make it to the next day and where I would be left while my biological mom did her traveling to God knows where ........................ But then I think ab it all and think ab where that life had led me to and I'm thank full it all happened because if I had had a nice little life and nothing was wrong I would not be writing this today you see God knew the whole time what my future was and even though I cried myself to sleep MANY nites and asked God for a nice family that loved me and did not yell at me and beat me for little things like not being able to find my strawberry bubble bath I know that God was working it out for me I have been SOOOO BLESSED with a family that is beyond my dreams I have a mom who loves me regardless of what I have ever done and shes always there to listen to me when I need a friend and motherly advice and a daddy that took me in and loved me and broke walls downs that I had built up against men because I did not trust them he showed me that I could trust him and hes never made me feel like I was not loved by him he has cried with me when I cried and he has loved me unconditionally my parents have been an example of what Godly people should be and they raised me in a God filled home. I have been blessed with a wonderful brother and sister who know that I was adopted and it makes no difference to them they love my little boy and have shown him what tia and tios are supposed to be you cant ask for more ....... but God has given me more I have a wonderful husband that I love and he loves me no matter what I do or say he still thinks I'm a wonderful person even when I'm cranky (and I can be VERY cranky) he has stood by me many times and has loved me and now I have a wonderful little boy Brodie and Brayden on the way and I just look at my and thank God for it all for I know I have done nothing to deserve any of it but he has given it to me anyway! I have friends and family that love me for who I am my husbands family love me you really cant get any better than that but just when I think that it does get better and I'm amazed at what God has given me
I know its a lot of writing but its been on my mind so when you think about the things that are going wrong in your life look back and see the things that have gone right and they are always more pleasant and more abundant

3 1/2 centimeters!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok I have made it longer than I did with Brodie and I have actually been able to experience the dialating part and the false labor too!!!! I went today and I found out that I was dialated 3.5 centemeters and I have lost one pound baby is doing good and mommy is too ok well I'm ready for his arrival I think ab it all the time now and with Camilla and Genesis being born it really gives me the itch! oh and by the way if you have not seen the girls they are soooooooooo pretty! we are getting ready for company here too so we have been pretty busy cleaning up we have to be ready for Brayden too so we are doing it all at the same time bending down is not easy though its actually funny to see me bend I have a hard time getting back up and sometimes I feel like I will fall over oh well its almost over I will try to post some more soon but I'm so tired I have been to the docs, zoo, and three stores today! yes I am now without energy and wish I could take a nap but my little Brodie is up and its too late to make him take one so I will have to settle for sitting on the couch.................. until later now